So in our last post that was titled like this, we visited some douche who thinks that he can get energy out of cars by making them worse. That was a bad idea. This idea is quite a lot worse. Here's the headline: Again, a preposterously bold claim. The idea is that this train would travel... Continue Reading →
TRANSPORTATION IDEAS THAT WON’T WORK (BECAUSE OF SCIENCE): PART 1
Eventually, there will come a day when people stop listening to "designers" with no background in physics who propose physics-based things. Until then, the word "designer" will continue to mean "dude with AutoCAD/Photoshop skills, a wild hair up his ass, and no connection to the actual world that real people live in." Now when you're... Continue Reading →
HOW ABOUT YOU LEARN HOW THE GODDAMN CAMERA WORKS FIRST?
Recently, I found yet another article with a title in the form of a question. Here's a hint for all you people that read things on the internet: if someone titles an article in the form of a question, it's not as interesting as the question would lead you to believe. Before you go checking... Continue Reading →
IN WHICH I RUIN A CHILDHOOD FANTASY OF YOURS. ON PURPOSE.
Remember when you were a little boy, killing small animals with knives and building fortresses out of dirt and sticks? Girls (55 percent of my audience), you can ignore this part. Anyway, the inevitable discussion that every single small boy has ever had is the following: if you could have any superpower, what would it... Continue Reading →
CELL PHONES DO NOT CAUSE CANCER. STILL. REALLY.
Listen, kids. Normally I try to come up with some kind of pithy title for my posts, often including a pun or a lot of swear words because I'm pissed off about whatever it is that's happening. Not today. And why, you ask? Because today I am sad. I am sad because the World Health... Continue Reading →
A PERFECT STORM OF WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
I've written about alternative medicine before. A lot. I wrote about Valkee, which is stupid, laser baldness treatment, which is stupid, and homeopathy, which is stupid. I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it elsewhere too, but I can't find it all. And now, here's another one. It all started when I saw this sign in my... Continue Reading →
THIS ISN’T ROCKET SURGERY
First things first. This story came from Inhabitat. Based on the vast majority of my previous experience with Inhabitat, we can immediately assume that they don't know what the fuck they're talking about. Second, they're talking about space and rockets, and based on my previous experience with basically any news source, no one knows what the... Continue Reading →
SADNESS IS JUST ANOTHER WORD FOR NOT ENOUGH FLASHLIGHTS IN YOUR BRAIN
Sometimes, people think of a problem that other people have, and they think, "Hey, I know how to fix that!" The problem is that a lot of these people are wrong. Some of them genuinely think they have a solution, but are to stupid to realize they're wrong, and some of them have a huge... Continue Reading →
IN CASE BEING BALD WASN’T A BIG ENOUGH BLOW TO YOUR EGO…
Apparently bald people would rather not be bald. To that end, there are approximately a billion metric fucktons of products available to aid them in their not-being-bald-based goals. I have no idea how many of them work, but I'm pretty sure that this one goes into the "does not work" column. That's the iGrow, the... Continue Reading →
OMG ALEIN LIFE HAS DEFINATELY PROBLY BEEN FOUND!!!1!
This seems to be the tone of most of the articles covering a recent discovery by Richard Hoover of what appear to be bacterial fossils in the Orgueil meteorite. And as usual, it's up to real scientists to make a desperate attempt to restrain the slavering news media and public and explain to them that maybe they... Continue Reading →
IN WHICH I EXPLAIN THIS NEW HOROSCOPE CRAP FOR THE PEANUT GALLERY
I'm sure most of you have heard that your star sign has changed. I'm equally sure that most of you don't know why it's changed, because the media made this sound like a magical astronomer conspiracy of doom, rather than something that no human being has anything to do with. They also made it sound like... Continue Reading →
TIDES! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY WORK?
There is an organization in this country called the American Atheists. They're mostly dedicated to maintaining the separation of church and state, but they have some other assorted causes. One thing that got them a fucking gigantic amount of press recently is these billboards. Now, they're not supposed to be inherently offensive, and I think they're... Continue Reading →
